Dating Advice for Men: The Worst Tips
If you’re in the dating world, you’re certainly going to get a lot of advice. Unfortunately, most of that device is fairly bad. Sure, you’ll find tips and tricks on dating websites and in magazines, but they rarely come from people who are actually successful at dating and are written more often for entertainment value than anything else. If you’re really interested in getting good advice, it’s sometimes better to look at what not to do rather than figuring out what actions to take. Below are a handful of the worst dating tips that you’ll find from w4m doublelist.
If you want a great example of terrible advice, it’s got to revolve around the practice of ‘negging’. Casually insulting a potential date to lower her self-esteem and make her more likely to interact with you is not only positively disgusting, but it’s also something that rarely works. Only engage in the practice of negging if you feel like getting a drink thrown at you and having your reputation absolutely ruined.
Feigning disinterest is one of those classic pieces of advice that is given to both men and women. No one wants to be too clingy, after all, and there are dozens of strategies that already exist to help men look like they just don’t care.
Whether it’s a refusal to meet the parents, an unwillingness to return texts until a certain time or just an air of boredom out of a date, these are actually huge turn-offs. It’s important to pace yourself in a relationship, but don’t pretend like you are not interested.
Make it About You
There’s something to be said about being open and honest in a relationship, but one of the most common mistakes that men make on first dates is steering the entire conversation to themselves. There’s a ton of advice out there that points out ways to make a man more interesting, but using the bulk of this advice really just makes you come off like you’re incredibly self-centered.
Try to remember that dating is a process that involves two people and that putting all the attention on yourself means that you are ignoring the other party. Try to be confident enough that you’re able to engage with the other party on an equal level.
Adopt a Persona
If you have ever been around anyone in the pickup culture, you already know about the adoptions of personas. You can spot these guys a mile away, looking for telltale signs like:
- Unusual clothing
- Strange hair
- Fake mannerisms
The idea behind adopting a persona is to get a woman interested enough that she’ll engage with you. The problem, though, is that you’re not being yourself. If you choose to present yourself as someone who you are not, you’re going to end up having trouble ever getting a second date. While it’s normal to want to be your best self, don’t try to be something that’s totally outside of your own reality.
The flipside of this has to do with aggressive pursuit. If you consume any kind of media, there’s definitely a popular misconception that every woman just wants to be pursued. Men are told to keep trying until the woman breaks down, at which point she’ll fall in love.
In reality, this is an incredibly frightening type of behavior that’s more likely to get you in trouble than to get you a date. Don’t be afraid to ask a woman out, but remember to back off if she tells you that she is not interested.
Taken as a whole, this bad advice seeks to gamify dating. Instead of thinking of your dates as a series of tasks that end with a reward, think of your dates as an interaction between two people who both have their own individual expectations.
If you can go forward knowing what you want and respecting what your potential partner might want, you’ll stand a much better chance of being successful on the dating scene. Pay attention to all of the bad advice above, as doing so will allow you to avoid some of dating’s most common pitfalls.